The Effects Of Blaming In Marriages And How Counseling Helps
People expect to be happy in a relationship. If arguments break out, they assume the partner is responsible. Relationships can end easily with this sort of thinking.
Both partners want the other one to set things right. But the partners themselves make excuses about their own behavior based on the other’s behaviors. Both eventually believe they are personally innocent, and the other had caused the rift.
Can a therapist do anything about this type of couple? According to him, “I slept with another woman because you are no longer interested in sex”.From her perspective, “I don’t want to have the type of emotionless and loveless sex you want”
It becomes a back-and-forth “you, you” game. It continues to the point of emotionally and physically exhausting the couple. Finally, the couple decide to go for counseling.
As a therapist, these are some things that can be done. A simple reminder of how their marriage can be healthy is good:
? Both couple tries not to hurt the other. If I am hurt by words or actions of my partner, I chose to upset myself. Couples can chose not to be hurt by little things.
? You deserve each other if you have been together for three months or more. Both of you play your part in your marital troubles.
? You cannot change your partner. You can give up if your partner is not listening to your advise. Do your part and do your best.
? There is no win/lose when one partner wants to prove they are right, it always ends up in lose/lose.
This Blame Game just creates helplessness in partners. If you are the blamer, you are actually claiming you have all-power over your partner’s feelings.
The relationship starts to look more like a parent-child instead of two adults on equal terms.
In the worst instance, this looks more like two children who want to act out being adults and having a relationship.
Those who encounter marriage complications are generally reluctant to look for specialized marital life therapies services. Anna Kounago is able to give assistance to young couples that believe their own relationships are in risk. Keep your romantic relationship as well as put love to your marital life! Pay a visit to marriage counseling internet site in order to get help.
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