Is divorce selfish? I think so!
First of all I am divorced and I believe that when I got divorced it was a selfish act. I have been divorced for 8 years now and the divorce still has not ended, it never ends when you have children. Most people think when the court finalizes their divorce that everything is over and they move on with their life. That is so far from the truth because your children still have to live with the divorce and since they have to live with it you do too.
I really wish someone would have sat me down and talked to me about what the children would go through. To me the hardest part of it all is knowing that I have hurt the very people I would die for. If one time someone expressed to me how torn up and broken inside my children would feel going from my house to his and vice versa, I think I would have fought a lot harder for my marriage. There are so many excuses out there and believe me I have mine, he ignored me and played videos games all the time. But really is there anything that a marriage cannot work through?
Sad to say I think people get married today with the thought that they can just get a divorce if things don’t go the way they want. If we just really took our wedding vows more seriously then none of this would be happening. We now live in a society where God is fading away; sometimes I wonder if that is why people do not take their wedding vows as serious because there is no authority.
I want to make this clear I am not throwing stones at people or saying you are bad if you are divorced because I know so many people in the same boat and they are coming to terms with what their divorce is doing to their children several years later. I just want people to stop and think about their relationship and is it really worth throwing away. Yeah maybe he does ignore you or doesn’t clean up after himself but can’t that be worked through.
If you are thinking about divorce just remember you loved your spouse enough to promise “till death do us part”. Are your reasons valid enough for divorce? How will this affect my kids?
From a person who is divorced with children, if you can make your marriage work it will be worth it. The best advice I can give is do not be selfish when considering divorce think about everybody involved and how much pain it would cause for years to come.
I want to make it clear I do not regret the path I have gone down because I have grown so much as a person. The biggest problem going down the rockiest path you can find is learning everything the hard way and all the time you waste. I hope that if people just take divorce seriously maybe they can be spared the rocky path and save themselves a lot of time.
By: Jennifer Haskett
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