Control Issues
Some of us have the need to be in control, to manage everything around us, to keep it up to a certain standard. This can be exhausting, tiring and endless, for to manage everything, to be in charge and in control of all we see, is not only impossible but futile. For in truth, you can not control anything, even yourself. What we see around us is always changing; we can not keep it a certain way even if we try. We are battling something that doesn’t exist. The act of trying to control anything, even if it is small, does give some sense of achievement. It allows people to feel a sense of calm; being in control of anything at all means you can be okay, it is all working as it should. But when something forces change and we can not manage it, what then? Sure we can try to control it, to be on top of it, but in truth there is no way.
Small or large efforts of control have no power. Being in control of what you or others do is impossible because everything changes, even yourself; therefore, it is a losing battle. The only way to win is to let go, to see the futility of trying to comfort ourselves by controlling anything. When we let go of trying it gets so much easier. If we can let things be as they are without trying to control it, it is one less thing we have to manage. Can you see the more you let go, the freer you are to be okay because your happiness is not derived from everything being a certain way?
You are allowing yourself to not only accept things as they are, but you are also taking away the endless battle that you have been fighting. You are opening up space to be okay with everything as it is. Remember, there is no truth in controlling anything, it can’t be done. The more one tries to control anything the harder it feels. The struggle is also amplified because of the need behind the desire to control. The issue with control comes from the desire for everything to be okay and the only way for that to be is by letting go of the battle and the need. One will be okay without things being a certain way. In fact, it will be far more likely without the impossible effort of controlling everything, for that can’t be done and is not real. Open up, let go, and accept that it will all work out for then you can live without the constant struggle of trying to control what can’t be controlled.
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