Salespeople, Do You Suffer from the Fear of Rejection? By Phil Glosserman
There’s a nagging fear—a sense of dread—that stops millions of well-meaning salespeople and other professionals dead in their tracks. Every day, the fear of rejection chokes off their chances for greater success. This silent crippler stops people from doing activities that could bring them more business and income. It stops countless salespeople in their prospecting and closing. It stops professionals from asking their clients for referrals. It doesn’t have to be this way, because, as you’ll soon see, the fear of rejection is based on an illusion.
In this article, I’m going to talk about overcoming the fear of rejection in sales, but even if you don’t consider yourself a salesperson, the ideas still apply—after all, in business, we’re all selling a product, service, or idea… and of course, ourselves.
There’s an old business adage that says, “Nothing happens until someone sells something.” Sales drives business, drives the economy, and puts food on people’s tables. That’s why outstanding salespeople are among the highest paid professionals in the country. Yet every day, salespeople who know their success depends on seeing and calling new people, sit on their hands and avoid prospecting for new business.
Rejecto-phobia
What’s so horrible about prospecting and why do people avoid it? For most people it boils down to the fear of rejection. They want to avoid that horrible feeling of defeat and diminished self-worth that arises when someone says no or isn’t interested in speaking with them. I call it rejecto-phobia.
It takes determination to get up every day and sell. A big part of that determination is being willing to reach out to people and be confident and persistent, even if it means hearing no. And in most businesses, even the best salespeople are likely to hear a lot more nos than yeses. Imagine working at job every day where your success depends on doing something that more often than not, leaves you with a feeling of rejection or failure. No wonder so many salespeople avoid prospecting, and instead spend their time at more comfortable activities, like admin, e-mail, social networking, and Web surfing.
But not all salespeople feel this way. Some people can prospect all day long without feeling rejected. And in applying themselves, hour after hour, day after day, they manage to get in front of more qualified prospects. How do they do it? Are they just thick-skinned, or even mercenary?
The main difference between these active prospectors and the rejecto-phobes is what goes off in their heads when someone says “no” or “not interested.” The rejecto-phobe hears no and thinks something like, “I knew it,” “This always happens to me,” “They don’t like me,” “I suck at sales,” “I hate this,” “Sales is a sleazy profession,” or “I’m a failure.” The active prospector hears “no” and thinks, “How can I answer this objection?” or “Ok—time to move on to the next person.”
The rejecto-phobe is subconsciously looking for approval, and when he doesn’t get it he feels deflated. The active prospector is looking to make sales. She understands that her job is to wade through the masses of people that aren’t interested to find the ones that are. That’s why it’s called prospecting—filtering through the mud and muck to find the gold nuggets.
Don’t Take No Personally
All rejection in sales is actually self-rejection. In sales, people don’t reject you. They may not be interested in your product or service at a particular point in time, but how is that a rejection of you personally? What the rejecto-phobes don’t realize is that rejection doesn’t come from other people—it’s a reflection of what they already feel inside about themselves!
The active prospectors—those that don’t get hung up in the idea of rejection—simply don’t reject themselves. In other words, they don’t take no personally. The good news for rejecto-phobes is that with a change in thinking and attitude and with the right guidance, they can change how they respond internally. And this can have a huge impact on their activity and their sales results.
People Sense Fear
Have you ever noticed what happens when someone is scared of a dog? They exude fear. The dog senses the fear and is apt to respond aggressively. Now imagine two salespeople prospecting for business. One is fearful of being rejected and the other believes in himself and what he’s selling. Will they approach prospecting differently? Of course. Will people sense their emotional states and respond to them accordingly? Absolutely!
Rejection is a story that someone makes up about what “no” means. In other words, it’s an illusion—a shadow. A shadow may cause someone to react fearfully, but have you ever been bitten by the shadow of a dog?
How to Get Beyond the Fear of Rejection
You can conquer the fear of rejection. The first thing to do to is see the fear for what it is and recognize that you create it yourself.
Through coaching, I’ve seen many salespeople get over their prospecting fears and become wildly successful. If you struggle with the fear of rejection I recommend you work with a sales coach who can help you move beyond your fears. Remember, if you avoid prospecting, there are plenty of proactive salespeople who are ready to grab the business you leave on the table.
No is an indication of an objection you’ve yet to uncover. One of the most important sales skills is overcoming objections. You’ll unleash your full potential in sales only when you’ve overcome your own objections to yourself.
Phil Glosserman is a sales and business coach with over a decade of experience helping people and companies become more effective and profitable. He works with salespeople, business owners, executives, professionals, and companies in a variety of industries, including financial services, insurance, real estate, mortgage, high tech, healthcare, public relations, accounting, and business consulting, to name a few. He is the coauthor of two books, Sell the Feeling: The 6-Step System that Drives People to Do Business with You and The Referral Code: Unlock a Constant Stream of Business through the Power of Your Relationships. His Web site is http://www.CoachPhil.com
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