Mixing up Au Pairs and children
My mums loves to tell how when I was two, and my sister a baby, so acute was my jealousy, that I used to catapult my sister across the room in her baby bouncer when no one was looking. Also, how one time, a sweet old lady cooing over my baby sister (not me), found herself smacked by a petulant and jealous little red head!
OK, so maybe this is an extreme example of sibling jealousy, but nevertheless, a new baby and the resulting change in family dynamics, is a subject to be handled sensitively. Of course, there is a raft of literature on the subject, (and Amazon is a great place to start for inspiration) but I wanted to add a few pointers of my own. These points are obviously general, since how you handle the situation depends on a number of key factors, including how many other children you have, their ages, gender and personality.
Firstly, keep an open dialogue with your child (or children) both before and after the baby arrives, allowing them to voice any questions or concerns they may have. Let them touch your tummy, talk about the growing baby, and read books about being a big brother or sister.
Keep telling your child how much you love them! You can explain that while you will have to spend a lot of time with the new baby this does not mean you doesn’t love them any less.
Have your child be involved with naming, helping set up the nursery, and picking out baby clothes and toys.
Write a letter from the new baby to your older child and consider giving a present from the baby. (I found people to be quite thoughtful in remembering to buy a present both for the new baby and my older son).
Bear in mind that jealousy may not be apparent at first, but might kick in Later down the line when baby demands more attention, crawling and getting into older siblings things.
Finally, hang in there! Yes, there may be jealousy, yes there will most likely be squabbles down the road (hopefully no catapulting incidents!), but when you see baby smile at big brother or sister, call out their name, and later still, play together, it makes it all worthwhile.
See at http://www.youtube.com/user/AuPairCare1989 how a strong relationship with au pair is important for comfortable living.
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