5 Possible Reasons You Are Still Single When You Know You Don’t Stink
Still single? Not sure why you can’t seem to find that special someone? Do you go on date after date only to find yourself never hearing back from your dates? There may be something going on that you are not aware of. In fact, the chances of you doing something wrong are pretty much one hundred percent at this point, because if you were doing something right then you wouldn’t be single.
Being single is not a bad thing, but scaring away every potential love interest is. Even though you may be taking a shower before your dates, using your best smelling perfume or cologne, and dressing yourself in your best clothes, there may be something wrong with your personality that your dates are seeing in you.
1. Focused on Yourself
Do you focus on yourself during the date? You may not even be aware that you are doing this! Try to think back to the conversations that you have on dates. Do you have a hard time remembering anything that anyone has ever said? If so, then you may be focusing completely on yourself during the date and not really listening to what your date has to say.
The problem is that we can listen to someone talk but not really listen. Instead we are preparing what we are going to say about ourselves regarding what they are talking about and quickly add our story into the conversation as soon as they are done, sometimes before they even finish talking.
Try focusing on what your date is saying and responding with a statement about what they are saying or a question to elaborate on what they are saying. This will make them feel as though you give a damn about them and will make them more interested in continuing to talk you on a second date.
2. Your Unique
You may be different from most people and that can turn a lot of people off. If you like star trek, crunching numbers, or talking about manifestation and law of attraction, then you may not be everyone’s cup of tea. In fact, you may have them deciding that they don’t want a second date before the main course comes. This isn’t a bad thing though!
Unique people are my personal favorite people out there. They view the world just a little bit different from everyone else and therefore they have a lot to add to this world and to a relationship with a mutually understanding person.
The problem is not your attitude in this case but the people you are finding. Instead of picking up girls or guys that everyone else says are the best of the best try finding someone who fits your likes, beliefs, and goals in life. Look online at a dating site that caters to people with the same interests or go to functions that interest you.
3. You Have an Annoying Habit
Maybe you say ‘um’ every second word or maybe you slurp your soup while you eat. These types of things can drive some people nuts and they may not have the patience to put up with an obvious annoying habit right from the beginning. The problem is that these habits are a part of you and you may not be aware of them.
In this case you are going to have to ask your friends or people you know well to be honest with you and tell you if you have any annoying habits that they can think of. Tell them you won’t be mad with them and let them know they are helping you get out of single land – they should be willing to help you out and be honest at that point.
4. You Have a Negative Tone To You
Negative people are not attractive, yet we tend to focus our conversations on the negative aspects of our lives. Think about the last time you talked to a stranger. The conversation was probably regarding the long line up, annoying surroundings, or some other complaint that you found mutually annoying.
Your dates don’t want to converse about your complaints. They want to know what positive things you have to offer them and why they should get involved in a relationship with you. If you find yourself spending more than 1% of your conversation complaining then you may want to practice a more positive tone of talking. You will be instantly more likeable.
5. You Are Too Honest
One reason could be your honesty. You may have a habit of being really honest and you think this a sought after trait – which it is, but when it comes to your dates you can really hurt their feelings if you are too blunt and honest.
An example would be if your date tells you that they should exercise more and you agree. Agreeing that they should exercise more is sending them a bunch of different messages. One message may be that you think they are out of shape. Another message may be that you are judging them and their lack of commitment. It’s really up to their imagination and insecurities, but either way you are going to make them feel bad which will not bring about good feelings towards you!
So if you find your date giving looks of hurt or anger after you say something, then you may want to rethink about how you respond to people and their comments. Always try to make your date feel better about themselves and not worse because – really, who wants to be with someone who makes them feel bad?
Are you unique? Possibly even considered a little bit geeky? Find out where geeks find love at Bellaisa’s website.
Bellaisa is the owner of the Relationship Circle, a website with relationship advice for men and women on dating, intimacy, and relationship problems.
Processing your request, Please wait....
